No matter what

There have been several days already when my back has ached, or I've been deliriously busy, or something has distracted me and it's been hard to practice yoga. I have to teach yoga, at least every-other day, and I've found that practicing makes my teaching better. Practicing also makes me much more patient with the kids I take care of, and my husband, and basically everything. It's become more than just, "I have to get through the practice." It is a discipline. It has focused my mind and soothed my soul, even if my back muscles are sore today.

Happiness has always been a bit tricky for me. Even as a child I wallowed in the mellow dramatic, insisting that the whole world was against me, or doomed by some horrible fate. And lately, with the BP oil spill, which has lead me to discover more oil spills all over the world, and the still struggling battle in the Afghanistan and Iraq, I have had many reasons to loathe this existence. A funny thing has been happening, however, I don't loathe life. The Buddha taught me that all life is suffering. And yoga has taught me that it is how you deal with that suffering that matters. Where I would once cry in bed for hours wondering what in the world I could do to save the starving children in India, I now realize that the joy and hope starts at home. I go out and share the lightness of yoga with other people. I've been trying to be that tiny pebble thrown into the big sea, watching my ripples move beyond my home. Sometimes, I do get caught up in the worries of the world. And then I have to hold some crazy bound warrior for an ungodly amount of time, and I everything on the outside fades away. All I am is breath and blood. I can only share so much of my blood, but my breath is infinite. It has sustained me through some very hard times, and has been my connection to all the life in this world. I only hope that through my teaching, and my prana, I can help other people find there breath, and connection.

How the time flies...

I was at a family gathering this weekend and my uncle mentioned how long it has been since I've posted on my blog. I realized it has been about 2 weeks without updates! And, oh! do I have updates! The past couple of weeks have been amazing. Let's start at the beginning.

My husband and I went to Cedar Point. We are both huge roller coaster fans, so this is an annual tradition of ours. I love being thrown at the earth at over 100 mph! Being a coaster professional, I know very well the benefits of post amusement park yoga. The increased pull on your spine alone from many of those rides, makes me want to hold uttanasana (forward fold) for 30 minutes. So at 11pm, after a long day of being flung through space, I rolled out my mat and decompressed. I have never felt better falling asleep after a long day at Cedar Point.

I have taken at lot of what I learned in that restorative workshop and woven it into my daily home practice. I did primarily restorative postures for my post-CP practice, and I used it every night during my backpacking adventure later in the week.

Normally, when I camp, I don't practice. Yoga for me is first and foremost a meditative practice. When I am in the woods, I already feel calm and don't need to meditate. However, I promised myself I would do yoga EVERY day, no exceptions! So I invented some strange melding of power vinyasa and restorative poses that could be done at night inside my tent.

I went backpacking, not typical camping. My husband and I carried everything we needed several miles into the forest. My yoga mat got left behind. This got me thinking. Why do I NEED my mat to practice? Shouldn't I be able to do some form of yoga no matter where I am? It rained everyday we were in the woods, and the ground remained a soggy mess of old leaves. If it had been dry I would have practiced outside, under the trees and stars. Instead, I practiced inside my little tent. This tent is so small that I couldn't fit my "down dog" into it. I found ways, through mostly core exercises to create a great internal heat. I even did some modified sun salutations, where I used child's pose in place of down dog. It was a great learning experience.

At some points during my practice in the woods, my breath seemed to echo the songs of the frogs and crickets. Yoga became even more of an amazing meditative process. I have never felt so at peace in the middle of a forest before. It was as if the woods and I were connected. The universal prana, the life that connects everything, was tangible during my yoga practice. I have left that week feeling an even greater since of camaraderie to all beings of this planet- from the little spider that made a web in my tent, to the fawn and doe that wandered into my camp, and now the squirrels in my backyard. I am beginning to understand that human beings are not at all separate from the animal kingdom or natural world. We may try to distance ourselves, but in the end, we are all the same breath, the same prana, the same inhaling and exhaling life force.

To run, or not to run?

A couple months ago, my husband and I promised each other that we would run in the Pittsburgh Spirit, a half marathon, in November. For a month or so, I trained, I ran and walked and ran some more. But I began noticing how tight my body was getting, and honestly I never liked running in the first place. Then, I started doing yoga every day. My body couldn't feel better, and without the running I'm much more open and less stiff. So I haven't found the motivation to run again. I even have my goals for the summer hung up at work; one says "train for a half marathon." Do I give up my mini dream of being a runner? Is my body telling me to stop or am I merely being lazy? To run, or not to run? That is the question.

Car yoga?

My life is crazy busy, and this past week was no exception. I found myself practicing yoga at home, by my in-laws pool, and in the car! Yes, in the car. This past Friday flew past so fast that I almost forgot to do yoga. My husband and I were headed to Ohio to visit family, and I decided if we got there in time I would just have to practice at their house. However, construction and traffic made us hours later than we had planned. So I pushed the back down on my seat, and did some seated yoga exercises. I actually worked up a sweat in my little 40 minute practice. I did some breathing exercises, core work, stretches and even bridge! Now, I doubt that this was the safest thing to do, but we were moving at 15 miles an hours, and I had to do yoga! So kids don't try this in your car, but know it was possible.

Anywhere, Anytime

I've been terribly busy lately. Rushing from my nannying gig to teaching yoga to all kinds of family and social things has kept my head and schedule spinning. This past weekend my husband and I planned on spending the Saturday at the lake. However, we did not plan to sleep in till 11. By the time we had gotten ready, all local yoga classes were long over. I told myself that I could practice by the lake, what a better serene place to connect with the universe. When I got there the beach was crowded with icecream-lickers, beach ball bouncers, soggy diapered kids! I tried doing a few inversions and a bikini clad down dog, needless to say I was awash with embarrassment. Lake yoga= fail.
That night we went to visit a good friend at his apartment. He has this open dining area without a table (typical bachelor). He practiced Tai Chi in that space, and I have to admit ever since my first visit to his apartment I have wanted to do yoga there. It is the perfect space, even if it is in someone else's abode. My husband and friend sat around watching Kung Fu videos and drinking beers while I watched the minutes tick by. It was getting closer and closer to midnight and I still hadn't done yoga! Was I going to have to start this year of yoga all over AGAIN?! I suddenly remembered that I had my mat in my car, and it came to me. Cue the light bulb!
I practiced in his little Tai Chi/ dining space, and it was great. I was amazed at how easily the breath took me out of the beer and Kung Fu atmosphere and into my own bodily experience. I was pulled away a couple times by raucous laughter, but all in all it was a great practice! And the night was a complete success because I finally convinced my friend to let me start teaching him yoga!
So far so good! I have not missed a day, and still love how the mere writing of this blog has forced me to make yoga a priority. I have never felt happier, calmer or healthier!

My savasana secret

Practicing every day has changed when I have time to eat, and my overall eating schedule. The times I would normally be snacking I don't so my stomach won't be full during practice. However, I've notice a new distraction filling my mind durig savasana- my hunger! I'll lay there during those 3-5 minutes of meditiative relaxation day dreaming about what I'm going to eat next! Instead of letting every muscle in my body relax or listening to my breath, I'm listing ingrediants and craving cookies!